2013 Father’s Day Plaque

This year’s Father’s Day was particularly wonderful for our family. As part of a weekend full of family time, I came downstairs on Sunday morning to find a very sweet card from my girls and this plague – which I hung in my office. It reads:

“Walk a little slower, Papi.”
said a little child so small.
“I’m following in your footsteps
and I don’t want to fall.”

Sometimes your steps are very fast,
sometimes they are hard to see;
So walk a little slower, Papi,
for you are leading me.

Someday when I’m all grown up,
you’re what I want to be.
Then I will have a little child,
who will want to follow me.

And I want to lead just right,
and know that I was true.
So walk a little slower, Papi,
for I must follow you!

Our sweet Eliana is just 18 months old now, so I know I still have a LONG way to go before I have any assemblance of parental wisdom. I’m hoping to pick up a few more nuggets of knowledge before our next little one comes along. But so far, here’s three things I’ve learned about being a Dad:

Ellie on Papi’s Shoulders

Treasure Every Moment
Between the work days, social commitments, and other things, it’s easy for weeks to roll by without even noticing. I take time every day to revel in our little girl’s latest milestone. And I hope I do that the rest of her life.

Lead by Example
That’s long been the “management philosophy” that I follow, and I need to do it even more at home. I still need to do a better job of eating my veggies for Ellie’s sake, but I hope that she sees how I live my life, how I treat others, and what I say is consistent with how I live.

Love Your Spouse
I want Ellie to grow up and have positive, productive, meaningful relationships with others and one day her husband. The best way I can model that is to love her momma. I don’t do it the best every day, but that’s always my goal and I hope she’s seen more successes than failures so far.

On Father’s Day, at Miamisburg Christian Church, Mike said something that really resonated with me:

A child is not likely to find a Father in God if they don’t find God in their father.

I am by no means perfect, and I never will be. But I hope I’m showing our family enough of God so that they will strive to do even BETTER in the future.

I have been a fan of Vince Antonucci for a few years now, and I’ve read all three of his books. First, he described how many Christians are missing out on the joy and hope that should come with walking with Jesus in I Became a Christian and All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt. And then in Guerrilla Lovers: Changing the World with Revolutionary Compassion, he shared stories of how he and other people he knows have gone above and beyond to show Christ’s love to those around them. And now, he shares more stories and challenges us to glorify our God with how we live our lives, and show them a path to Jesus by being Renegades.

Time and time again, the Bible tells us stories of those that went against the grain and stepped outside of their comfort zone to do something great for the Lord. Those days haven’t passed. Today, we are still called to follow His calling in our lives: even when it’s a little bit scary, or uncertain. Remember the old saying – “God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called.” All we have to do is listen. And once we do, one great way to keep on track is to write it down. And then look at it over and over again. Vince calls it writing out your destinations, and here’s one he shared at the end;

So, for instance, here is the destination I wrote for my relationship with my kids:

• I am an example to Dawson and Marissa of what it looks like to radically love God and love people. They know that I don’t love perfectly, but I don’t pretend to, and my passion for wanting to love God and people, and my authenticity about it, allows them to follow my example.
• I love my kids unconditionally, and they are secure in that. But I love them too much to not help them become more like Jesus. So I lovingly encourage them to completely live their lives for him.
• I believe in my kids and I am their number one fan. I do everything I can to help them become everything God has in mind for them, and to accomplish the dreams he puts in them.
• I am always available to my kids and they know it. I make time for them so we’re together a lot. We plan and do lots of special things together. I am fun to be around, and they want to be with me.
• Together we are living dangerous lives of faith because we follow Jesus, and he leads us to places we’d never dare go without him. We do it gladly because we’re willing to do whatever it takes to follow Jesus and help others to know him.

Take some time to prayerfully write the destination you want to arrive at for each of your life’s journeys.

So what do you think? Have you written down any of your goals or plans for your life? What can YOU do to be a Renegade?

I guess it was late in 2004 when Pastor David at First Christian Church challenged all of us. He asked “why can’t you go on a mission trip; do you have a good reason to say no?” A few months later, when they announced that our church would be going to Haiti, I remembered his words and thought to myself – “no, I don’t really have a good reason”. So I signed up. We ended up going to the Dominican Republic that first time instead, and it was a WONDERFUL experience.

I went back to the DR the following year, and then have gone on several more trips with Miamisburg Christian Church – where we choose to worship now – since 2006. And even on return trips to the same country (and same mission), every experience is unique and precious to me. We do different things with each trip but helping people and sharing the gospel is always the main thing. It’s also an opportunity to take myself out of my comfort zone with technology and work, and focus on His higher calling for my life.

Someone once said to me that “… too many Christians take mission trips as a glorified vacation”. He’s never been on a short-term mission trip, and I don’t think anyone that’s been on one would agree with that statement. Is it work 100% of the time? No. But it’s far from a vacation. And if were just leisure, I wouldn’t have chosen to go to Haiti or Arizona in July!

Some people call us “missionaries”, but I shy away from that label. To me, missionaries are those that do it year-round. That’s our goal, as a family, to do missions full-time one day. But for now, I just enjoy the opportunities to serve on these trips. And we serve locally as well with various ministries at our church, and with our friends at Bogg Ministries.

Odds are there is someone around you that’s going on a trip. Why not join them? Or why not support them financially, and/or with daily prayers? This year, I’m leaving behind my wife who I’m CRAZY about, our beautiful 17-month-old daughter, and another on the way. It’s not easy, and I could justify the argument that “I just can’t right now”. But I don’t think that’s what He’s called me to do. And one day, God will be calling my whole family to serve somewhere in full-time missions. And we’ll say YES!!

Our 2009 Scion xD

Several years ago, I was very irresponsible with my finances. One example was how I was able to justify getting another truck with a higher monthly payment, even though I knew I was about to take a job making less money. I used my credit cards pretty freely, and when I got married, I brought in $20K in debt and a near-$500/month truck payment. I am so grateful that Gaby was able to see past all that, and still say yes.

We went through Financial Peace University at our church in the Spring of ’08, and later that year we decided to trade in BOTH of our vehicles to get one. We were both taking the bus to our respective jobs at the time, so it wasn’t a problem to go down to on vehicle. There were a handful of times where it was “a problem”, but not many in that one year span – until we bought our first car in CASH for $1,200 that is still running like a champ today. And even though we were a ve thousand upside down my truck, our monthly payment for the Scion was still over $100 less per month.

And yesterday, after paying a little extra here and there and building up our savings… we were able to pay off the remaning balance, in full – 21 months early! This has been a great vehicle for us, and has proven to be very reliable. We’ve made several cross-country trips in it to Tennessee, Kentucky, and down to Laredo, TX and back a couple years ago. And oh yeah – all that credit card debt is long gone too.

We are committed to paying off all our debt (besides the house) by Ellie’s 5th birthday. And now, all that’s left are our student loans. And like Dave Ramsey (FPU) talks about, we’re attacking those with gazelle-like intensity now!

The Super Bowl is commonly known as the single largest Human Trafficking incident in the United States

A few years ago, I got involved with the Dayton Task Force of Love146. Love146 is committed to the end of human slavery, and our Dayton Task Force is focused on creating awareness and taking ACTION to help end this tragedy in our world. Did you know that there are 27 MILLION people in slavery around the world today? There are slaves here in the U.S. and many slaves around the world are transported through or abducted in the United States.

One of the facts I learned a while back is how Traffickers use the chaos in the respective host city of the Super Bowl to move victims through. I love the Super Bowl, and I’m excited about the upcoming Harbowl. But I will be praying for and thinking about the women and children who’s lives are taking a tragic turn this weekend. This kind of thing HAS to stop!!

Last year, when the Super Bowl was in Indianapolis, Theresa Flores and many others combated this problem. Sadly, I wasn’t able to help that time, but several members of our Dayton Task Force were there to help with the S.O.A.P. campaign. Here’s an article regarding last year’s event: http://www.wishtv.com/dpp/news/local/marion_county/human-trafficking-survivor-in-indianapolis-before-super-bowl.

This year, when you watch the Super Bowl, please take a moment to pray for the victims. I look forward to the day when this is no longer a problem.

Human beings as a lot are incurably religious. The problem is that since these 1 same human beings are also infected by sin, they tend not to desire to honor and glorify the true God, who is righteous and holy. Rather, they tend to make gods for themselves that are pleasing to them or that satisfy some sense of what they think a god ought to be. As John Calvin said, the human mind is a factory for idols. Such gods, concocted by the rationale of humans apart from special revelation, are invariably out of touch with the truth (Romans 1:18-32).

What hope is there for those who do not live in predominantly Christian parts of the world? Historically, Christians have argued that their hope lies in the mission impulse of the Christian church. From the earliest days of Christianity, Jewish believers began to spread the message to the Gentile world (Acts 10-11). Christians such as the Apostle Paul made it clear that it was not good enough even to be a Jew, since the hope for salvation rests in affirming Jesus as Messiah (Philippians 3:7-11). In the early centuries of the faith, Christians spread the message to Africa, northern Europe, the British Isles, and the Asian subcontinent, all because they believed this message was the hope of salvation for the world.

It is obvious to anyone that vast numbers of people in the world today either have never heard the gospel or have heard it in only a cursory manner. What hope do such people have? The Bible makes it clear that there is no salvation in any name other than that of Christ (Jn 14:6; Ac 4:12). That means that one must believe specifically in Jesus in order to be saved (Rm 10:9-14). Does this mean that most people ever born will spend eternity in hell? If so, is that a problem for the Christian faith?

A couple of proposals have been offered to respond to this difficulty. Some have suggested that God will evaluate all people according to the “light they have.” That is, if someone is a Hindu or a Muslim or an ancient Aztec, God will judge that person only according to his response to the religious information he has at hand. The problem is that the Bible regularly condemns idolatry. Scripture even indicates that idolaters know intuitively that there is something wrong with their idolatry (Rm 1:19-20). The other problem is that many actions of religious people are terrible. Hindu Kali worshipers murdered travelers, and Aztecs sacrificed young women to their god. Another proposal is that God will simply save all persons by His power. The difficulty here is that it ignores human free will as well as the fact that the Bible indicates that some will eventually go to everlasting punishment (Matthew 25:46).

Christians must hold that faith in Christ, and only faith in Christ, is the avenue to salvation. But having said that, God will judge those who have heard the truth and yet have rejected it more severely that those who have never heard (Luke 10:14). There is also the hope that in the future the church’s message of salvation will cover the entire earth.

(For another perspective, see “What About Those Who Have Never Heard About Christ? by William Lane Craig”)

Extracted from the Apologetics Study Bible.

This book details his memories of growing up in Chicago, his rise through the ranks of basketball, his relationships with family, and his journey to becoming a father. I enjoyed his stories about his accomplishments on the court, and reading about the strength of his mother to overcome a drug addiction and today serve the Lord in ministry. He described the struggles he endured with his ex-wife in a custody battle, and why it means so much for him to be the full-time guardian of his two sons and nephew. This quote from the book sums it up well:

Fatherhood, to me, isn’t something you do for awards or acclaim. It’s a privilege and a huge responsibility. Of course, the recognition I’ve been given has been flattering— except I don’t think it makes sense to honor me for what I should be doing in the first place. That said, I do hope that by opening up in ways I haven’t in the past, I can encourage other fathers or father figures to get more involved with their kids’ lives.

In reading this book, I was again reminded how important the memories are that I create with my daughter. I learned some other ways to encourage and relate to my children, and I look forward to the wonderful journey of fatherhood ahead of me.

If you’re interested, read more of my public notes and excerpts.

The reassuring lesson is clear. God used (and uses!) people to change the world. People! Not saints or superhumans or geniuses, but people. Crooks, creeps, lovers, and liars—he uses them all. And what they may lack in perfection, God makes up for in love.

He makes up for in love. In a world of imperfection, persecution and incessant doubt, He still saves us. I read a book a while back (Twelve Ordinary Men by John MacArthur) describing how Jesus’ closest followers were everyday people. They were Christ’s closest followers, and the foundation of the early Christian Church. And you know what? God still does that with us, today. He has rescued me from a cynical, jaded outlook. He’s replaced indifference with empathy and passion. And I know that He’s only getting started.

In the end, I think this excerpt sums it up nicely:

He is the King of Kings, the Lord of Lords, and the Word of Life. More than ever he is the Morning Star, the Horn of Salvation, and the Prince of Peace. But there are some hours when we are restored by remembering that God became flesh and dwelt among us. Our Master knew what it meant to be a crucified carpenter who got thirsty.

What I didn’t know, until I read this book, was the struggles that Walter Payton had in his personal life, particularly in his marriage. The biography I read was written posthumously, but it sounds like it was a well-known fact that Walter was unfaithful to his wife. And not just a few indescretions… the book details several long-term extra-marital affairs that he engaged in, and the story of an illegitimate child.

“Walter said he couldn’t see him . . . it would be too hard. I showed him pictures and he had a tear in his eye. Then he left and never looked back.” Two months later, on March 15, Connie gave birth to Brittney, the couple’s second child. The arrival was all over the news, and images showed Walter gazing lovingly toward his little girl. Before long, Payton would be named Chicago’s Father of the Year by the Illinois Fatherhood Initiative. He accepted the award.”

And this is the man that the NFL memorializes with their Man of the Year award? According to Wikipedia, The Walter Payton Man of the Year award is given annually by the National Football League honoring a player’s volunteer and charity work, as well as his excellence on the field. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walter_Payton_Man_of_the_Year_Award) But what about his infidelity? Not that Walter Payton didn’t do many other great things for his community and his family. But isn’t his legacy tarnished because of his affairs? Couldn’t the NFL find someone of higher integrity to name the award after?

Now, I’m reading Emmitt Smith’s book, Game On. I was following the NFL for most of Emmitt’s career, and have always had tremendous respect for him – as an athlete and as a man of integrity. I’ve long considered him one of the true good guys in the NFL. And that’s why I was surprised to read this quote from Emmitt: “I may have surpassed Walter’s rushing record, I will spend the rest of my life trying to live up to that man’s character.”

Unless Emmitt’s hiding some affairs of his own (which I highly doubt), I would say he’s already surpassed it. I’m frustrated that the NFL and a good chunk of our society turns a blind eye to infidelity. I remember all the hoopla around Steve McNair’s death. But take a look at how he died? Is it just me? I think the NFL’s Man of the Year award should be renamed to honor someone else… maybe even Emmitt Smith.

One of my most treasured possessions is a Bible that belonged to my Grandpa Johnson. I love seeing his notes in the margins. I love seeing which verses he underlined. Sometimes I’ll even do personal devotions out of his Bible.

I want to leave a similar legacy for my children. In fact, I want to give each of my children a Bible that was prayed through specifically for them. I recently got my hands on a Bible edition inspired by an idea that comes from Jonathan Edwards, the eighteenth-century theologian and pastor. Edwards loved writing notes while he read, so he hand-stitched blank pages into his Bible. In the Bible edition I have, every other page is blank, allowing me to write prayers and record thoughts for my children. I’ll give each of them their own personal copy before they go off to college.

My friend Wayne has done the same thing for his children. He prayed through the entire Bible with each of his children in mind, starting with his oldest son, Timothy. He circled and underlined verses that were Timothy-specific. He wrote notes in the margins. He literally prayed every promise for his children.

My wife has such a Bible (with a blank every-other-page) that she’s been keeping notes in for the last couple years. But this weekend, we’re going to go buy another one dedicated to Ellie. And over the next 18+ years, we will spend time circling His promises for our little girl. We will write love notes to her for things she’s done as she grows up. And then at the appropriate milestone in her life (maybe graduating high school or college, or maybe on her wedding day), we’ll give her this book God’s promises… with some personal commentary from Mami and Papi.

Another quote from the author:

Now let’s be honest, our children don’t always appreciate what we do for them at the moment when we do it. It’s usually not until we have kids of our own that we appreciate the sacrifices our parents made. So don’t be disappointed if you feel your prayer circles aren’t making a difference. They are. They will. Or maybe you feel it’s too little too late. Listen, it’s never too late to be who you might have been. Maybe your kids are already adults and you feel like you missed your opportunity. God gives us a second chance, and it’s called becoming a grandparent. You can do for your grandchildren what you failed to do for your children.

We pray circles around our baby girl every day, and it makes me smile to think of all the wonderful ways that He is going to answer those prayers in the years ahead.